LIFE !

life why do u have to be so mean to me. I don’t want this anymore I want to stop enjoy whatever beauty if left in the world. I want to see hope and want people to love each other for who they are not what they are. And I don’t want this cruel harsh life although everyone keeps tell me it not that hard then why do I feel the way I fell and no u can’t call me emo just because I try to solve every emotional disorder I have I want to live breathe air without poison run down my lungs .....and I want life to be easy or at least meaningful to me I want education I don’t fear it but I fear losing it so I don’t even try hard ..And later I can give the excuse to life itself that I didn’t try hard enough and I love the people in my life but I never can find a way to tell them because I always screw it up BAD!
I want to stop take a break ...y wont time stop 4 me.... And the other tat lay beside me...We need a break...I cant take this ...stop lying to me to make me feel better cause I fall even future and I won’t last long if u keep doing this ...a friend asked me if I would visit her grave ...if she died but seriously y wouldn’t I, was that even a question?! And it made me think..do I have anyone who would visit mine when I m gone ...so 4 long as I live ...plz make my life beautiful in every way and help me lean from others mistake and stop the misery u keep bring in front of me.... I just want a normal l life ... nothing much nothing less... if I can get that then I’ll make something out of myself..... I promise!

I was having a normal day ..and then all of a sudden everything tat ma parents were saying kinda felt like a insult to me like they were putting me down ...... and every request i made was blown-off for apparently no god damn good reason .... and then all of a sudden i felt all these emotion which were god knows why even their to being with going outta control in ma body ...and the next thing i new i was tearing up ... but tat wasn't it i mean when i tried to control it ...it became worst!!...and kaboom...out it was ...on ma moms face ...i was scream at her for no reason and my dad was just staring at me .... and the next thing i knew my mom was swearing AT ME .....and i knew i should have went out of the room or something ... but i just didn't have time!!..it all happened 4 a sudden..
well....newayz ...when i came back home from school ... 4 some god damn reason .... my dad and mom ...were acting like nothing happen!....i mean tats weird!?? and rare ... rite! .... yesterday they all were swearing at me and now all happy family !! .... but it made my soul happy 4 sum reason .... and i don't really care if they were acting or whatever .... it just made me happy! ... like i was starting new or something!!....so i don't really care what made it happen it happen!!.....


.....So people do intend to have emotional breakdowns ...and i suppose you would say its okay !...but no ....i mean you are supposed to be in control of your emotions and in short everything u r ...rite?!
....... well ..... so .... all in all ..... everything does happen 4 a reason!! ....
bad or good....just doesn't exist!!

I know confusing and maybe you'll not get what i mean ....but its alright!! .... its not that that counts .... its the thought of it :D

okeiii!!!!!...heya
so i finally make ma 1st blog ...due to the continuous bragging of ma friends (no offense ....i still luv u guyz ....muwaah.... :D) and since they all gt one ....o y shouldn't i .........but lets see how long this would last !!! .........

OMG!!! OMG!!!..i hav finally done it !!!